Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
You have to summon your inner elephant
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
