I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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