How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
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