is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
