So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
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