One girl and one boy is just not enough.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
