Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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