Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize
