...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
