so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Randomize
