i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Randomize
