I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Randomize
