garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
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