if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
