I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
