Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
