i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
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