i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
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How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
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An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
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