just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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