Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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