love makes seman taste better
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
