It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Randomize
