Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
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