But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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