i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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