were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Randomize
