I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
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