She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
