Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
