Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Randomize
