How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
