I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
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