so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
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