Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Randomize
