She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
