ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
