I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
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I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
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can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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