you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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