why didn't you poke me back
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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