Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
