that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
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