Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
Randomize
