More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Someone signed my nipple.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize