I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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