Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Randomize
