yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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