I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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