What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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