my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
