why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I think i got beer on your cat.
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